Along Came a Spider
*
Cinema
Releases - May 4, 2001
Rated on a 4-star scale.
Certificate 15. 104 minutes.
Directed by Lee Tamahori. Written by Marc Moss, James Patterson. Starring
Morgan Freeman, Monica Potter, Michael Wincott, Mika Boorem, Penelope Anne
Miller.
Criminal psychologists in the movies usually have
all the answers. That's why psychological thrillers have become so popular.
There is a certain fascination to the way the doctors piece together killers'
mindsets and plans, and the way the villains commit their crimes in patterns
that form puzzles to be solved.
"Along Came a Spider" is such a
lousy movie that it can't even be bothered going through those motions. Dr.
Alex Cross, played by Morgan Freeman, is constantly saying "I honestly don't
know…", giving the movie an excuse to step away from psychology and
get wrapped up in dumb action sequences and the tedious mechanics of a crime
investigation.
The plot is the now familiar set-up of some nut-job
performing strange killings and kidnappings as a way to taunt a celebrity
cop. Clearly the wackos of America have nothing better to do than stage elaborate
games for the police. The highlights of this thriller sub-genre include "Seven",
the lowlights include "The Watcher"; somewhere in the middle resides "Kiss
the Girls", the first movie to feature the character of Dr.
Cross.
"Kiss the Girls" was not a great movie -- I would
describe it as a lifeless retread of "Silence of the Lambs" -- but it tried
a helluva lot harder to thrill us than "Along Came a Spider", and Freeman
looked less bored in the lead role. The distinguishing feature this time
round is the number of huge twists; but they're twists for the sake of it,
tacked onto the screenplay to allow it to keep turning corners, as all its
plot threads hurtle towards dead ends.
The film is irritating, pointless and cheesy,
all right, but it's also extremely boring. You'd think that gunfights and
depraved criminality would be gripping. All I could think of during "Along
Came a Spider" was how much I wanted a chicken sandwich.
COPYRIGHT©
2001 Ian Waldron-Mantgani
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