Cinema
Releases - October 19, 2001
Cats &
Dogs
***
Certificate PG. 87 minutes. Directed by Lawrene
Guterman. Written by Glenn Ficarra, John Requa. Starring Jeff Goldblum, Elizabeth
Perkins, Alexander Pollock; with the voices of Tobey Maguire, Alec Baldwin,
Sean Hayes, Susan Sarandon.
Rush Hour
2
*
Certificate 12. 90 minutes. Directed by Brett
Ratner. Written by Jeff Nathanson; based on characters created by Ross LaManna.
Starring Jackie Chan, Chris Tucker, John Lone, Ziyi
Zhang.
I've seen arguments about whether cats or dogs
are better that have come close to blows. People are amazingly passionate
about which animal they prefer. It's quite astonishing. I mean... dogs are
obviously better, right?
"Cats & Dogs" goes way overboard
in agreeing with me -- it's a staunchly pro-dog movie that argues cats once
enslaved humans, dogs came to the rescue, and the ongoing battle between
the species is based on that history.
The plot of the movie involves cats trying to
reclaim control of the world by destroying the research of a doctor played
by Jeff Goldblum. Goldblum is attempting to cure dog allergies; the cats
want to rework the potion into something that would make all humans allergic
to dogs, so they would have to get rid of them.
I like well-done talking animal pictures. Last
week I gave a glowing review to "Doctor Dolittle 2". "Cats & Dogs" is
even more ambitious -- it's put together like a proper spy movie, and for
kids will be more fun than any James Bond or "Mission: Impossible" feature.
There are terrific special effects and gadgets, along with lots of action
and adventure. Mr. Tinkles, the feline mastermind, is a potentially legendary
villain. The movie also has wild ninja cats and stunningly clever secret
agent puppies. My six-year old cousin Jade probably appreciated the movie
more than I did, but I sure liked it a helluva lot.
.
"Cats and Dogs" is surely a better movie for kids,
grown-ups, or pretty much anyone than "Rush Hour 2". When I
reviewed the first "Rush Hour" picture back in 1998, I said that it was okay
but complained of too much plot and not enough comedy or action. This time
round I didn't even notice the plot, because I was too busy being annoyed
by the comedy.
Another handy reference to my 1998 review shows
that I thought Chris Tucker was "in good form", having learnt that "onscreen
stupidity is not funny, but the stupidity of the stupidity is" -- whatever
the hell that means. In "Rush Hour 2" Tucker gives one of the most annoying
comic performances in recent memory. Every shot seems to be a close-up of
his bulging eyes and smug grin, as he acts up for ninety minutes and achieves
nothing but bugging the hell out of the audience. He screeches, shouts, flaps
his arms around, talks faux-jive -- and not one second of it is
funny.
The first picture was a standard cop comedy about
partners from different backgrounds who form a grudging affection for each
other -- Jackie Chan played the calm Hong Kong policeman, and Tucker was
the Los Angeles loudmouth. The sequel features all the same scenarios, except
Chan and Tucker already know each other, so less setting up is required.
Given that the acting was decent in the original movie, I figured "Rush Hour
2" would be a leaner, funnier and more entertaining piece of work. What I
had not counted on was that sometimes when comedians are involved in a big
success, they think they can do no wrong, go for broke and end up acting
like complete wankers.
Tucker thinks he has the Midas Touch. He thinks
that when he squalks and hisses and does bad impersonations of Michael Jackson,
he will be necessarily funny. He's dead wrong. "Rush Hour 2" has better scenes
of action than the first picture, but that's about all I can say in its defence.
It runs for an hour and a half and still feels too long, and Tucker is so
grating in his performance that I may well have nightmares about
it.
COPYRIGHT©
2001 Ian Waldron-Mantgani
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