House!
**1/2
Rated on a 4-star
scale
Screening venue: Warner Village (Birkenhead Conway Park)
Released in the UK by Pathé on May 5, 2000; certificate 15; 89 minutes;
country of origin UK; aspect ratio 2.35:1
Directed by Julian Kemp; produced by
Michael Kelk.
Written by Jason Sutton; based on an idea by Eric Styles.
Photographed by Kjell Vassdal; edited by Jonathan
Rudd.
CAST.....
Kelly MacDonald..... Linda
Mossie Smith..... Kay
Jason Hughes..... Gavin
Freddie Jones..... Mr. Anzani
Miriam Margolyes..... Beth
Bingo is one of the most boring and aimless pastimes
there is. How it became popular with elderly people in this country is beyond
me. They've had so much experience of life that surely they know of something
to do that's more interesting, and less cheesy. Why do they spend their evenings
in garish halls, listening to lounge performers calling out random
numbers?
It's probably just as well, then, that the focus
of "House!" is an attractive young lady named Linda, played
by Kelly MacDonald, who you will remember from "Trainspotting" (1996). She
gets our attention even in the ugly atmosphere of La Scala, a damp and creaky
building that's been a music hall and a cinema, but now just caters to the
bingo players.
The owner, Mr. Anzani (Freddie Jones), remembers
fondly his days as a film projectionist in the same place, telling stories
about the wonders of Fellini and Lang. "I'd still like to think we offer
more than just bingo," he says, and indeed between games he engages the patrons
in friendly chit-chat and cooks them spaghetti from a family recipe. But
the personal touch just won't cut it: A quick drive away, a huge new bingo
hall is set to open, with celebrity guests, bright lighting and a huge car
park. La Scala offers dust and dry rot.
Linda, who works as an usher, is getting worried
about whether the place can survive, when she discovers a sort of telepathic
ability. In any bingo game, when she thinks of a number, it comes up! If
she can use this to win the £1million star prize in an important national
tournament, then her own security, as well as that of her place of business,
is guaranteed. I don't know why she doesn't just play the National Lottery
and bugger off to the Caribbean with the jackpot, but hey, to each his
own.
The problem with "House!" is that its good parts
cancel each other out and its bad parts are just plain bad. There are some
involving passages of dialogue and glimpses at the drab locations -- the
ambience of "The Full Monty" is achieved once or twice, if not the genius.
Then again, one of the things which keeps the film interesting is exactly
what spoils that drama, and that's the way the director, Julian Kemp, uses
flashy camera and editing tricks to bring his picture to life. Consider an
early, obligatory scene in which Linda speaks to The Guy She's Always Loved
But Has Never Made A Move On, and Kemp flash-cuts between tiny hand and eye
gestures. The technique turns a would-be clichéd conversation into
something intense and passionate. Directing the story in the same manner,
however, just causes obstruction.
It's also pretty hard to enjoy a movie whose climax
hinges on a bingo game. It needs to charm our pants off before we set aside
enough prejudice to put up with it. There's no way "House!" can do that when
it's being cluttered by such annoying things as the performance of Mossie
Smith. She plays one of Linda's co-workers, an obese woman in tight-fitting
clothes who reminded me of those "You're too large to dress sexy!" episodes
of Ricki Lake. Smith delivers her lines in a flat, rambling monotone without
ever emphasising any particular word, with a combination of smug grin and
miserable wince, and eyes stretched open to the size of tennis
balls.
This could have been an okay picture if the filmmakers
had cleared away some of the obvious dreck, and then decided what kind of
movie they wanted to make -- hyperactive stylised piece or sweet British
comedy? Interestingly enough, "House" was also the title of a very successful
horror movie when I was growing up. If they'd thrown in some of that,
things would really have been interesting. Consistency be
damned!
COPYRIGHT© 2000 Ian
Waldron-Mantgani
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