House on Haunted Hill
**1/2
Rated on a 4-star
scale
Screening venue: Odeon (Bromborough)
Released in the UK by UIP on February 4, 2000; certificate 18; 115 minutes;
country of origin USA; aspect ratio 1.85:1
Directed by William Malone; produced by
Gilbert Adler, Joel Silver, Robert Zemeckis.
Written by Dick Beebe; based on an original screenplay by Robb
White.
Photographed by Rick Bota; edited by Anthony
Adler.
CAST.....
Geoffrey Rush..... Stephen Price
Famke Janssen..... Evelyn
Taye Diggs..... Eddie Baker
Peter Gallagher..... Dr Blackburn
Chris Kattan..... Watson Pritchett
Ali Larter..... Sara Wolfe
Bridgette Wilson..... Melissa Marr
William Castle was one of the great showmen of
cinema, a creator of cheesy horror features who once said he modelled his
career on that of P.T. Barnum. The gimmicks Castle used to market his films
would make a good movie in themselves -- he once, for example, arrived at
one of his premieres in a coffin, delivered by a hearse.
Far more characteristic for Castle were mechanical
tricks such as 'Percepto', whereby people would get a signal that a monster
was loose in the auditorium, and the only way to kill it was to scream. His
1958 film "House on Haunted Hill" boasted 'Emergo', a system of fitting theatres
with huge plastic skeletons that would jump out on unsuspecting members of
the audience.
It is probably impossible to recapture Castle's
unique brand of stunt-orientated entertainment for today's moviegoers. Gone
are the days when cinemas would consider letting you fit seatbelts or
electro-shock buzzers in their seats, and it's doubtful that savvy modern
kids would respond to B-movies as enthusiastically as youngsters did in the
1950s.
The new remake of "House on Haunted
Hill", which has been directed by William Malone and produced by
Hollywood giant Joel Silver, is an admirable if not completely successful
attempt to get into the spirit of Castle's genre. It has few ironic references,
and most of the actors don't go to great lengths to point out that their
tongues are in their cheeks -- the movie really does play like an attempt
to scare us using grotesquely over-the-top atmosphere and fairground techniques.
We only know the filmmakers aren't that stupid because we trust nobody would
ever expect us to take this schlock seriously.
The characters are a goofy bunch, perfunctorily
thrown together in accordance with some hack screenwriter's manual. You've
got a dumb blonde (Bridgette Wilson) and a smart one (Ali Larter); a cheap,
goofy loser (Chris Kattan) and an affluent professional (Peter Gallagher);
and a wise-cracking tough guy (Taye Diggs), who also happens to be the token
black character, as all the others are white and there isn't really room
for anyone else. These kids find themselves invited to a spooky mansion that
used to be an asylum, by eccentric zillionaire Stephen Price (Geoffrey Rush).
He makes an offer of one million dollars... "To whoever can survive the
night!"
Price is an innovator in theme-park design, you
see, who loves his work and gets a kick out of scaring people in new and
exciting ways. He has rigged the house with perilous gadgets galore in order
to do this, too, but -- need I even say it? -- the house really does turn
out to be filled with evil spirits, and all the characters find themselves
fighting for their lives.
Rush gives a good performance here, with a sly,
trailing voice that is perfect for relishing his odd, playful lines -- his
character is the kind who, if asked whether a phone call is business or pleasure,
would give a twisted grin before responding "Neither... it's my wife!" He
has a crazy little moustache that was grown to be twirled, and bushy eyebrows
meant for raising. Rush is the only big star in the picture, and that's a
nice touch, as Vincent Price had the same distinction, and the same role,
in the original.
Other visual and aural treats arise from the haunting
itself -- to be honest, a few of them really did creep me out in some basic,
crude way. We see the passageways of the house as grimy, labyrinthine, ominous;
the soundtrack manipulates the rear speakers brilliantly, giving us the sensation
that sinister whispers, scratches and squeals are happening in the aisles
of our screening room.
I was not as endeared by the human violence in
the movie -- much of it is inappropriately gruesome, in contrast to the innocence
of the supernatural gore. And the film never quite goes as far off the rails
as it should -- those original B-movies, you will recall, resembled loud
protests against refinement, craftsmanship and good taste.
Still, I'm impressed that the film is watchable
at all. Remakes and horror movies are so hard to do right they're disaster
areas for filmmakers, and embarking on a horror remake is like actively seeking
public embarrassment. "House on Haunted Hill" was critically savaged in the
States, where it was seen as a slapped-together attempt to cash in on Halloween.
That's unfair -- it's a lot more sophisticated than the adverts suggest.
I didn't exactly like it, but it's hard not to have some affection for it;
no film that reminds me of dear old William Castle can be all that
bad.
COPYRIGHT© 2000 Ian
Waldron-Mantgani
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