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Tomb Raider
***
Cinema
Releases - July 6, 2001
Rated on a 4-star scale. Certificate 12. 95
minutes. Directed by Simon West. Written by Patrick Massett, John Zinman;
adapted by Simon West from a story by Sara B. Cooper, Michael Colleary, Mike
Werb. Starring Angelina Jolie, Jon Voight, Noah Taylor, Iain Glen, Daniel
Craig, Christopher Barrie.
Lara Croft, heroine of the biggest-selling video
game in history, is the ultimate male fantasy. She has a perfect figure,
tight clothes, and knows how to handle herself. Her image has become famous
not just at video game conventions, but on billboards and in fashion magazines.
Folks who have never played the game, including myself, know very well who
she is.
If Viagra had not been invented, the film version
of "Tomb Raider" would be hailed as the way to maintain an
erection for an hour and a half. Sorry to be crude, but sometimes a guy has
to admit to his animal instincts. Angelina Jolie, who plays Lara, is the
hottest thing on legs, and in this movie we get to see her jump around, sweat,
break things, beat people up, fire guns, wear skimpy shorts and even take
a shower, all with the cunning grin and playful eyes made famous by her previous
performances.
The plot is some nonsense whereby Lara has to
stop a Masonic cult from getting hold of ancient Egyptian stones that give
the power of God to whoever finds them and brings them together. Of course
this is just a clothesline on which to hang big action set pieces, in which
tombs are raided, asses are whupped, and there are lots of shots stolen from
Harrison Ford movies like "Raiders of the Lost Ark" and "The
Fugitive".
The best scene of action takes place in the middle
of the movie, when Lara and the bad guys battle it out for possession of
one of the stones amid booby traps, statue warriors that come to life and
a giant swaying battering ram. Throughout the rest of the picture there are
moments that could do with being a tad leaner and more energetic. Every scene
looks fantastic, and in not taking itself too seriously the movie finds the
right tone; but there are perhaps one or two too many dull little scenes
of omens and threats, when I was expecting the non-stop hyperactivity of
"The Mummy Returns". The fact that the British version of the film has been
cut by several minutes of violence to get the 12 certificate can hardly have
helped.
No matter -- this is still superior popcorn
entertainment, and Lara has been brought to the screen attractively. Since
the purpose of "Tomb Raider" is to showcase her, it deserves praise on that
basis alone. Now I want to see a movie featuring the redhead from Sugarbabes,
walking through the rain in a nurse's uniform.
COPYRIGHT©
2001 Ian Waldron-Mantgani
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